Dear Student:
After reading the introduction paragraph I was expecting a discussion of
man's perception of women and why a woman should be "chosen".
What "story or incident" prompted this discussion? What work (or
works) are these ideas based on? I was unclear about what "story or
incident" prompted you to address the issues of man's perception of
woman and why a woman should be chosen.
Paragraph 2
I was confused here; after reading this paragraph I expected a discussion
of the disadvantages of thin women. How does this tie in man's perception
of women, why a woman should be chosen, or the "story or incident"
you are discussing?
Paragraph 3
Where was God headed? What incident(s) in the Bible reveal where God was
headed? Why are man's choices filled with sin? Why should man change "if
God is forever watching him"?
Paragraph 4
What are "all the perfect genes"? I was confused by the term "new
self". Could you explain "Eve's new self", especially in
relation to her old self? The contemporary example of GLOW painted a clear
visual picture. I had a clearer picture of Eve.
Paragraph 5
"After Adam and Eve at of the tree of knowledge", why was only
Eve changed forever? Could you add support from the Bible of Eve's frame
before and after she sinned?
Paragraphs 6,7, and 9
If a woman is "small figured" is she automatically "less
intelligent"? Are there any "less intelligent" big women?
What is the difference between lust and love? Does love deal with "having
children or finding companionship"? Could you elaborate [on] "paintings
of old"? Did you have any particular artist or painter in mind?
Paragraph 10
I was confused by the phrase "responsible for this". Responsible
for man's change in desires, man's disregard of big women, or pre-renaissance
paintings? Why do small women offer more sin? After reading the last sentence
I expected to hear more about "know one really knows why people are
attracted to anything". Does this effect your contention that man is
attracted to thin women because of lust and love of dominance?
This paper grabbed my attention from the beginning and held it. The use
of varied examples, from art to contemporary (such as Glow) and other writer
added to the essay. I was confused, however, about which "story or
incident" you were analyzing for your paper. What does this "story
or incident" teach the reader? Is the incident from Genesis or The
Inferno? If you have any questions, please contact me.
Renee Macbeth