My commentary for an ESL paper

Dear Student:
In this paper you present a new culture to the reader, one in which serving a guest refreshments and dinner, a common activity when a guest is in a house, means so much more than is apparent at surface value. After reading your paper I learned a lot about what serving guest refreshments and dinner meant. The paper was very interesting and I enjoyed reading it.

The assignment asks for an "everyday sight with significance obvious [to] everyone" but which also [has] another less obvious meaning for the community in which it is displayed. After reading your paper I thought that feeding a guest refreshment is a form of respect due to the guest and the guest must take what is placed before him as a way of showing respect for the host. Am I correct? Also, please explain why taking no food is rude to the host and illuminate on other possible meanings behind serving a guest.

I also experienced confusion in some parts of the paper. Is the opening sentence "Many things are happening everyday, and it almost happen to every person or every family" a direct translation of a phrase common in Arabic? This sentence, although it is in keeping with the American academia precept that the introduction should be general, the sentence is a little too general for the American reader to understand. I also was confused about the phrase "it's kind of shame they don't". Do you mean "a kind of shame" as in type or category of shame? Do you mean "kinda a shame" or "it is sad that", which is an American slang phrase?

Finally, the references that were made to Fish need to be "cited" and tied to your main idea. I can better [explain] citing at our conference, or if that is not convenient, please feel free to call me. Also "tee" is spelled "tea".

Renee Macbeth

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